Baby, It’s Cold Outside

 

First off, I know I don’t have any right to complain. I didn’t get hit with the snow bomb.  I have a garage at home.  I work indoors.  I park less than twenty yards from the front door of my office (this wasn’t always the case, and on days like these it’s the biggest perk of my current job).  Therefore, I can choose to spend less than ten minutes outside each day.

Even so, I just have to say…yikes, it is cold.

Plus, everyone is sick.

Christmas is over, ladies and gentleman. Welcome to January, home of low temperatures, high fevers, and aneurism-inducing credit card bills from all that holiday shopping.

Thus far, I’ve managed to avoid the sickness part by interacting with my co-workers only though instant messenger and phone, even if they sit right next to me.

Outside of work, I’ve become a hermit. If people’s germs can’t reach me, they can’t infect me.  On-line shopping and canned goods can sustain me for the duration.  I’m not letting another person breathe on me until February, if not March.

The good news is I have a pair of thick socks, sweatpants, and my new Outlander sweatshirt to wear when I’m home. The bad news is I’ve worn them all week.  The good news is I live alone so there’s no one to comment on the odor.  Sorry, Blinker.  Kitties don’t count on this one.

Yesterday I was forced to interact with others at work. I sat at the table with freezing feet, and while the group discussed our new product launch, I became fascinated by the man sitting next to me.

Well, not fascinated by him, exactly. By his shoes.

Because they weren’t shoes. They were slippers.  Brown suede slippers stuffed with wool.  They had rubber bottoms tough enough to wear outside.

Or to work, apparently. Thank you casual Friday!

If it’s a cold day when I go to heaven, St. Peter will be standing at the gate with a pair of these slippers in my size.

 

I asked the man about the slippers, and he said they were UGG moccasins for men. I guess moccasins is a more manly word than slipper.  I had no idea UGG made slippers.  Excuse me, manly moccasins.

As soon as the meeting was over, I raced back to my desk and pulled up the UGG website. Sure enough, they had women’s wool-lined slippers rugged enough for outdoor use.  The price was outrageous.  And anyway, I’d made a New Year’s Resolution not to buy anything I didn’t need.

So I clicked off the site and went back to work. I don’t have to tell you how this story ends, do I?

The slippers will be here Tuesday.

Now I just have to figure out how to get them into the house without opening the front door and letting all that cold air in.