Last week I was running late for work so I decided to skip cooking breakfast and instead hit the McDonald’s drive thru and pick up an Egg McMuffin.  I ordered the food and pulled up to the first window.

I had a lot on my mind and was listening to a podcast as I handed over the money.  The clerk gave me my change and told me to pull up to the second window for my food.

I didn’t pull up to the second window.

I just drove away.

That’s right…I paid at the drive thru and then left without my food.

I think the kids call this a “brain fart.”

Fortunately, I immediately realized my mistake and turned back toward the drive thru before I’d even left the parking lot.  I maneuvered my car around all the others in line, and then cut off the woman about to drive to the pick-up window.

If anyone got angry with me, I thought it would be her.

She had every right.

But a glance in the rearview mirror showed her perplexed more than anything.  I was fairly certain I wasn’t about to become a victim of road rage, so I turned to the clerk at the window, who was starring at me with an open jaw.

“Umm, yes…” I began, deciding to see the humor in this.  “I’m the idiot who bought food and then just…”

Before I could finish, she shouted, “AND THEN JUST DROVE AWAY?”


Apparently I was still at risk of becoming a victim of rage violence after all.

“Yes,” I admitted, about to make a joke but she just scoffed and walked away.

I know it was a dumb thing to do, but it had been 45 seconds since I’d pulled away.  Surely the Egg McMuffin was just sitting there, right?  I figured they hadn’t even realized what I’d done yet.

But the woman stomped around, banging things like I’d ruined the whole schedule for the day and was trying to rip them off.

Again…I came back in 45 seconds, not four hours later demanding my Egg McMuffin.

This lady made me wait.  And wait.  And wait.

Whether or not she was teaching me some kind of lesson, or whether my actions had really perplexed them so deeply, I’ll never know.

She practically threw the bag at me and handed over the coffee.

“Have a nice day!” I said.

I swear she harumphed.

I missed the bartender at the Hula Bar.  She would’ve grabbed whatever bag of food was at hand and said, “here’s your order” with a big smile, knowing I wouldn’t have had the guts to bring it back if it was hot cakes or hash browns.

The Egg McMuffin was hot and delicious.

But I don’t think I can go back to that McDonald’s for awhile.  I’m pretty sure my picture is hanging up under their “especially idiotic customer” board.